


never really over

by trixstar



Series: Hubert Week 2020 [4]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Drama, Exes, Ferdinand von Aegir & Dorothea Arnault are Best Friends, Hubert Week 2020, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Making Up, Reunions, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:20:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26932018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trixstar/pseuds/trixstar
Summary: What's one to do when your ex suddenly decides to show up at a party after years of no contact? And you may not be over him?Ferdinand's going to find out whether he likes it or not.Written for Hubert Week Day 7 Prompt: History
Relationships: Edelgard von Hresvelg & Hubert von Vestra, Ferdinand von Aegir & Dorothea Arnault, Ferdinand von Aegir/Hubert von Vestra
Series: Hubert Week 2020 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1955665
Comments: 8
Kudos: 71
Collections: Hubert Week 2020





	never really over

**Author's Note:**

> this is the first idea i came up with when i first looked at the hubert week prompts so ive essentially been excited for this since day 1 ehe just an important note that ferdie is 18 and hubert is 20 at the start of their relationship then theyre in their post ts ages for most of this yes thats all 
> 
> i hope y'all enjoy it <3
> 
> title is from the song never really over by katy perry 
> 
> EDIT 10/22/20: i did some editing, separated some paragraphs and added one more ending-like one to ease my conscience. story's still the same uwu

Ferdinand’s never been one for panicking.

He liked to conduct himself in a composed, regal manner, befitting of someone who possessed the Aegir name. Being… fidgety, eyes seeming to fly all over the place, and incessant foot tapping isn’t him. In fact, on the wrong people, Ferdinand even found it distasteful more often than not. Contrary to popular belief, he _could_ be judgemental like that.

And yet.

“Caspar, where is Dorothea?” 

He’s trying his best to keep his tone, calm, _controlled_ , as if he wasn’t freaking the hell out because _how could he not._ He thinks the constant looking-over-his-shoulder gives him away though, if Caspar’s eyebrow raise is any indication. Curse Petra’s kitchen and its fantastic lighting.

“Uh, no, actually. I think she and Petra are upstairs?” Caspar stacks another solo cup precariously on top of Linhardt’s head. Head facedown on the countertop, the man can’t really do anything to stop it. “Last I heard, they were trying to get Bernie out of a room after she locked herself in. Are you okay?”

“ _Fine_ ,” Ferdinand lies, forcing a smile on his face, “do you happen to know which room specifically?” His grip on the kitchen island tightens as he throws another glance behind him. What are the chances _they’d_ enter this room, he wonders.

“Petra’s bedroom probably." He cocks his head at Ferdinand, “what’s up?”

“Just… some new arrivals Dorothea probably wants to greet. That’s all,” the smile is starting to hurt his cheeks, “Petra’s bedroom is the first room you see directly after climbing the stairs, correct?”

Caspar nods. “Mhm. You sure you’re okay though? You’re never so… panicky.”

“Absolutely fine, I promise you,” Ferdinand says in a rush, already halfway out the door as he plots his route, “thanks again, Caspar.”

“Oh, no problem! Who’re the arrivals anyway?” Then Caspar gasps. “Ah! Are Edelgard and Hu-”

Ferdinand is out of the kitchen before he can hear the rest of the sentence. If he’s the slightest bit flushed then that’s no one’s business but his own. And maybe H- 

_No_. _Damn it_. He is _not_ going to think about this. Never again. No, no, nope. _No_.

Ferdinand steels himself before beginning to navigate the absolute chaos that’s become of Hu- _Petra’s-_ _Goddess why_ \- living room. Dodging a condom thrown by a drunken Sylvain at a red faced Dimitri and exchanging pleasant smiles with Marianne and Ignatz as he walks past them, Ferdinand nearly weeps with joy as he finally arrives at the foot of the stairs. He glances around again. _Safe_. Then proceeds to climb up with all the grace of a blindfolded horse. (Which was not very graceful, Ferdinand had learned.)

“Oh, Ferdie! Hi!”

He breathes a sigh of relief at the sight of Dorothea standing in front of a wooden door. Donning a pretty red long-sleeved dress that ended just above her knees, she is, by far, the most beautiful thing Ferdinand has seen tonight. 

“ _Dorothea_.”

She raises an eyebrow at his demeanor, Petra peeking at him curiously behind her. “Why are you so out of breath?” She looks down at the stairs then back to him. “Did you _run_ up the stairs?”

He reddens, sheepish. “Yes, but that’s-”

“Is everything alright-”

“Did you know _Hubert_ was coming?”

The words all come out in a rush. _Damn_ the man. Just saying his name still has Ferdinand flustered. Years and even the mere _mention_ of him always had Ferdinand visibly reeling. Years and he’s still blushing, Thinking with a capital T, and he absolutely _hates_ it. Hates _Hubert_. Dark, broody, attractive Hu-

 _Fuck_.

“Oh,” Dorothea says simply, “he and Edie are finally here? Great!” She turns to the door. “Bernie! Edie and Hubie are here! Petra and I are going to entertain them but we _will_ be back.”

From the other side of the door, Ferdinand hears Bernadetta squeak and, normally, he’d take pity on her (the noble thing to do of course), but he’s very busy trying not to lose his shit right now.

“ _You knew?_ ”

“Of course I did, Ferdie. Don’t sound so betrayed.” She places her hands on her hips, “It’s a _reunion_. I told you Petra and I would invite everyone. You even _encouraged_ it.”

“Yes, but that’s because I didn’t think he’d actually come!” he confesses, face flushed, gesturing at the bottom of the stairs and praying that the topic of their conversation didn’t suddenly manifest there. He used to do that. Hubert was sneaky and quiet. And, _damn it_ , Ferdinand used to find it endearing and he _still_ does.

“You’re going to have to face him at one point,” Dorothea says sternly, “it’s been _years_. Edie and I are _friends_. I know Edie and _you_ are friends despite... _the thing," s_ he gives him a hesitant look, _"_ You can’t possibly expect to avoid him forever.”

He casts his gaze to the floor. “Because he and Edelgard are attached to the hip, you mean.”

And, Ferdinand thinks to himself wryly, Edelgard _had_ been the cause of _the thing_.

Probably taken aback by the bitterness in his tone, Dorothea and Petra share a look.

“Ferdie,” Dorothea says softly, finally taking pity on him, “look, I know he hurt you. I was pissed at him and Edie for a long while too, but you have to move on. It's what's best for you. Fine, you don’t have to talk to him tonight. If you really want, Petra and I will actively steer you away from him, but it would be good for you if you could talk to him sometime soon." She pats his shoulder as she and Petra walk around him. "Get the closure you deserve, you know?"

"I said I was over him and what he did," he insists quietly, eyes still glued to the floor.

Dorothea sighs. "And we all know that's a lie."

 _It is_ , Ferdinand doesn't say, but feels as though he doesn't have to anyway.

The thing is, he knows she's right. It's been _years_. Years of boring dates and suffocating pining for a man an entire ocean away. Years of hurting, aching longing. Of moping, getting jealous of other couples, and reminiscing for a time- a _relationship_ long gone. 

(Gone were the sweet little coffee dates, the warm hugs, the lazy kissing in the backseats of cars, the unprompted tea bags left in convenient locations for him to come across, the-)

Hubert had ruined him, ruined romance for him. The _least_ he could was give Ferdinand closure.

He sighs. "I- _fine_. Tomorrow. I'll do it tomorrow. At the Black Eagles only meet-up," he tries for a smile, "keep him away from me until then?"

As an answer, Dorothea leans up to ruffles his hair affectionately before descending down the stairs. Without even looking, Ferdinand knows she's attracted every pair of eyes on the first floor.

Petra pats his shoulder with a smile as she moves to follow. "We will be doing our best, Ferdinand. You can count on us!"

He allows himself a small laugh. "Truly all I can ask."

She gives him one last encouraging grin before finally skipping down the stairs, entrance punctuated by Caspar's enthusiastic shout. Ferdinand winces at the volume of it, pitying the living room denizens.

"I guess it's just you and me, Bernadetta." He knocks on the door feebly before sliding down against it. "Is there any chance I can hide in there with you?"

Ferdinand is hardly surprised when he gets no response.

With nothing better to do, he unlocks his phone, taking a moment to glower at his home screen before opening the Sudoku app. A nerdy past time, he knows, but Ferdinand's always found the game calming. Even more when he had his airpods connected to enjoy the soothing background music. He takes them out from his pocket and proceeds to do just that, content in drowning out all the racket from downstairs.

Parties had always been a source of enjoyment for Ferdinand. He could not help his being a social butterfly. He'd been raised to thrive off of others. He's energized around people, lived off of the attention sometimes, although he'd never admit it. Being alone was something he's never enjoyed. 

It's probably why he always insists on bringing a date.

Ferdinand curses, tapping on the wrong number. _Plus-ones_. Another thing Hubert had ruined for him.

Years and still nothing could beat the feel of the man's arm around his waist, holding him close, anchoring him to the room. Still nothing compared to admiring the contours of his face as he grinned crookedly down at Ferdinand, a sight so endearingly genuine, always making Ferdinand's stomach flip flop. _Years_ and still nothing holds a candle to the sweet nothings Hubert used to whisper in his ears before taking him away to some dark, private corner where... where they'd...

Ferdinand groans as he feels his entire face warm at the memories. Tucking away his phone and bowing his head, he foolishly lets himself relieve the little moments.

_A wicked grin. "You wore that just to tempt me, I assume?"_

_A mouth to his neck. "My, Ferdinand, needy tonight, aren't you?_

_A breathy sigh into his ear. "Did my talking to Hilda so much truly make you jealous?"_

"Ferdinand."

_A hand at the back of his neck. "You're insatiable sometimes, you know that?"_

"Ferdinand."

_A palm warm in his. "I love yo-"_

A loud thump against the door behind him startles Ferdinand into raising his head.

Then he feels a pit open up in his stomach and his heart beat impossibly fast.

"Long time no see." Hubert von Vestra looks down on him with his damn half-smile, voice still so velvety and... _Goddessdammit_ , sexy.

Despite being dressed in only a white polo shirt and black slacks, Ferdinand finds himself speechless at how devastatingly attractive Hubert still is. Growing into the sharpness of his features and cutting a handsome frame, thin waist and broad shoulders. He'd cut his hair, but a mop of it still covered an eye. And, just like before, Ferdinand only thinks it adds to the charm.

Fuck. Fuck. _Fuck_ -

"Hubert," he greets and regrets it immediately because, _no_ , he did not mean to sound _that_ breathless. What was wrong with him? He struggles to his feet and holds a hand out on impulse. 

Hubert eyes it with amusement. "A handshake? I believe we're past that, don't you think?"

"Would you prefer a hug then?" Ferdinand counters. As a reflex. His eyes widen at the words.

Why, why, _why_ did he always have to pick a fight with Hubert? What is he even doing-

Hubert snorts.

"I wouldn't be opposed to it."

 _Well_.

'I- uh- well," Ferdinand flounders terribly, fidgeting, "I did not think-"

"But you seem to be uncomfortable with the prospect. _Understandably_. We'll save it for a later date."

Ferdinand stills.

 _Understandably_. So they're just going to dive right into it, are then?

It's a subtle thing, the shift from being flustered to being inexplicably angry.

"Yes _understandably."_ He looks up at Hubert with sharpness. "It's only appropriate, is it not?"

Hubert winces. It's almost imperceptible, but Ferdinand notices. (He always does.)

"I suppose."

"What brings you here anyway?" Ferdinand crosses his arms. "The party is downstairs."

Hubert shrugs, smiling wryly as he leans against the wall. "I wanted to follow the head of orange that fled at the sight of me entering the door."

Ferdinand flushes. All his subtlety had been thrown out the window the second his ex had entered the house.

" _Understandably_ , you said about me not wanting a hug," he purses his lips, "running away only seems appropriate too." The words sound pathetic even to him.

"I'm not saying it wasn't," Hubert tells him softly and _damn_ him for looking at Ferdinand like _that_.

He looks away. "Why did you come looking then?"

Hubert releases a small breath. "I'm not sure if you're going to like the answer."

 _When has that ever stopped you?_ "Tell me anyway."

"I..." Hubert sighs. "I missed you, Ferdinand."

And Ferdinand feels his heart stop.

Really.

 _Fuck Hubert von Vestra_.

Fuck him straight to hell. This is unfair. Uncalled for. What did Ferdinand do to incur the Goddess' wrath like this? What horrible deed did he commit in his past life to warrant this punishment? Fuck this. Fuck him.

"You," Ferdinand feels himself choke up as he turns back to face him, "you can't just come back and say that. It's cruel, _unfair_."

Hubert sighs. "I know-"

"No, you don't!" The weight on his chest is burning. "You can't just _seduce_ me into telling you my father's secrets, break my heart, _leave_ , and never even call only to come back and say _this_ to me," he feels his eyes well up, "it doesn't work that way, Hubert. It _doesn't,"_ he spits out.

A flicker of emotions cross Hubert's eyes then. Emotions Ferdinand's always been intimately familiar with. Sadness. Self-loathing. Longing.

 _Regret_.

"I know I can't. I'm not so foolish as to assume I can fix what's happened with words alone," he laughs bitterly, "I never even apologized, did I?"

 _You didn't_ , Ferdinand can't bring himself to say, _but I still waited_.

"Never," he breathes out instead, "but I get the feeling you do not feel like you need to."

Hubert's posture goes rigid.

"I did what I had to-"

"For Edelgard, I know," Ferdinand grits out, vehement. The words are sludge in his throat. "You've always done everything for her, Hubert. _Everyone_ knows. It's one of your defining personality traits," he laughs morosely, "devotion to Edelgard. The only person you've ever love-"

"I loved you."

Ferdinand finally lets the dam burst.

Hubert can't do this to him, he thinks, tears streaming down his face. He can't just say those three words with such tenderness and honesty. Like the way he did before. Ferdinand almost believes him.

Ferdinand _wants_ to believe him.

"But you still chose her over me," he says quietly, bowing his head, "then you left and never said anything and now you're back and you-" he chokes, not bothering to finish the sentence.

Hubert is quiet. And a moment of just Ferdinand's sniffling echoing in the hallway passes before he finally inches closer to him.

Hubert tips his face upwards gently, producing a handkerchief from his pocket and proceeding to dab at Ferdinand's tears softly.

"Edelgard," he begins quietly, "has been with me since we were toddlers. She is my best friend and she was suffering, Ferdinand. And I made it a vow to always put her first for as long as I needed to."

Ferdinand scoffs. "How is this-"

"I don't need to anymore."

He feels his eyes widen.

"You think it didn't hurt me too?" Hubert continues, anguish evident in his tone. "You may not believe me but having to inflict such pain onto you made me sick. I thought myself unworthy of even your friendship when Edelgard and I had to leave. Which is why I never reached out. Condemend myself to years of your absence as punishment."

"Hubert..."

"I loved you. I still do," Hubert tells him, voice barely above a whisper, fragile, _hopeful_ , "and I'm capable of putting you first now, above everyone else. If you'll have me, I'll do everything I can to correct my mistakes. If you'll have me, I'll treat you better this time around. The way you deserve to be treated, Ferdi-"

Ferdinand cuts him off with a bruising kiss.

Their mouths slot together easily, hauntingly familiar as Ferdinand throws his hands around Hubert's neck and feels the man's arms encricle his waist. Warm. Anchoring. He licks into Hubert's mouth desperately, needy.

Ferdinand feels like his entire body is burning as he grasps the hairs at the back of Hubert's neck.

_I missed you too. I never stopped loving you. I missed this. I've wanted this._

Hubert moans into the kiss and the sound is the most beautiful thing Ferdinand's heard in a long time. He pours all his feelings into this kiss. All the longing. All the yearning. The love that never really went away, ever present as it consumed Ferdinand from the inside day in and day out.

His own moan is cut off when the door behind them bursts open with a bang. Hubert and Ferdinand jump apart to meet the eyes of what seemed like a very flustered Bernadetta.

 _Oh_.

Ferdinand feels himself flush. "Bernadetta-"

"Con- Congratulations!" The girl blurts out before he can finish, eyes shut tightly as she clutched- was... was that a notebook? How many pages had she filled up while-

Ferdinand feels mortification settle itself into his very being.

_Had she heard the whole thing?_

"Bernadetta," Hubert greets, trying and failing to sound casual, "it's a pleasur-"

"Yeah, great. You can use the room now. Bye!"

Words compressed into a single breath, both men are left dumbfounded as the girl scampers down the stairs quickly, leaving them to understand the words a second later.

Ferdinand blinks.

"Did she... give us permission to..." he trails off, looking down at the floor heatedly. Goddess, he wonders just _how much_ she heard.

"I believe she did," and when Ferdinand looks up, he's met with a wicked grin that does horrible things to his heart. Hubert's eyes sparkle alluringly.

"It would be a shame to let it go to waste, wouldn't it?"

And Ferdinand cannot bring himself to agree more.

(They'll talk about things tomorrow. Let their friends say what they will when they see Bernadetta sprinting down the stairs. Tonight, it is just him and Hubert. Tonight, it is just them.)

**Author's Note:**

> Wow this came out a lot longer and angstier than i thought haha <\3 and yeah bernie wrote a whole ass fic listening to that sob story good for her
> 
> ANYWAYS that's a wrap for hubert week! i tried really hard not to make it ferdibert but alas,,,,,,,, anyways thanks for reading! i love hubert with a burning passion so it's always nice to know others feel the same way uwu <3 if you havent, consider checking out my other hubert week fics or ferdibert fics ehe 
> 
> kudos and comments appreciated!!
> 
> [@trixstarsss](https://twitter.com/trixstarsss)


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